Use Your Mind
to master your brain & obsessions!

You Are Not Your Brain, by brain scientist Jeffrey Schwartz, is about the brain, the mind and how to use your mind to master your brain’s bad obsessions and compulsions.  It’s closely related to the RAIN method for mastering cravings.

It provides a 4-Step method which helps you become the person you want to be. As a self-treatment method the 4-Steps works well for the mild to moderate obsessions and compulsions most of us have.

1. ReLabel – Spot & name. Practice spotting, identifying, and naming false brain messages as soon as they appear.
2. ReFrame –  It’s Not important. Start recognizing that false sensations & thoughts are not important because they are false.  And, if not fed attention, they eventually go away.  E.g., Say to yourself “It’s not me it’s just my brain.”
3. ReFocus – Do something productive. Redirect attention towards a productive activity even though you still feel uncomfortable. It’s not what you think or feel that matters; it’s what you do that counts. p.339
4. ReValue – Keep practicing the first three steps until they become an automatic part of you. Eventually learn to see the entire process from a wise outsider’s point of view.

This approach is possible because the mind “gives you the capacity to choose where to focus your attention.” And, over time focused attention will actually physically change your brain which only “automatically reacts.”

Background
The brain is a passive survival mechanism that receives inputs and reacts in instinctive or habitual ways to ensure immediate safety, comfort, or relief no matter what the future costs. (p.22 from You Are Not Your Brain).  It merely reacts to its environment in habitual, automatic ways.

Its speed and automatic efficiency has done a good job of keeping the human race alive. However, not all the short-term survival habits we have unconsciously learned are beneficial in the long-term. The brain messages (including body sensations, thoughts, urges, feelings) sent are sometimes false and cause serious long-term damage.

That’s where the mind comes in. The mind is active, focusing attention and making decision.  It “has the ability to consider many options and can weigh short-term actions against longer-term goals.” p.22.  The mind is naturally “lazy” but when it decides to do its job of making choices the mind is able to override the brain.

Thus, you are not your brain. Brain-based messages are not representative of who you really are and you do not have to act on them. These highly deceptive intruders are coming from your brain … not you!

“The whole point of the 4-Steps is to take you from believing so strongly in your deceptive brain messages to seeing their falsehood.” p.ivii.  Repeated practice of the 4-Steps will give you the power to take control of your brain and, in fact, to physically change it.

---

The 4-Steps:

Step 1 – ReLabel (Spot and Name)    top

Our short-term oriented survival brains sometimes generate deceptive brain messages, such as wrong thoughts and uncomfortable sensations, that are just not “true” and cause us to react in ways which cause long-term damage. These false messages are what we should be watching for and labeling. Step 1 is to see and call them what they really are … false brain messages. p.89

Brain messages naturally bubble up from the unconscious on their own. Don’t try to suppress them but instead observe carefully. You are looking for the truth. You want to start recognizing “false” messages for what they really are.

Relabeling skills come before everything else because until you can see a falsehood you can’t fix it. Even if you continue acting in harmful ways just doing this first step alone gives important practice at noticing brain messages and properly labeling them as “true” or “false.”

Examples of relabeling: False message. All-or-none thinking. Obsessive thought. Butterflies in stomach. Sadness for no reason. You might relabel tiredness, body aches, and negative thoughts as depression (label) and not part of me (reframe).

Mental Notes
Making mental notes is “the process of becoming aware of and focusing your attention toward noticing the appearance of a thought, sensation, urge, response, or event as it arises.” Making notes implies focusing long enough to remember what happened; this allows you to start noticing harmful patterns. p.33

Keep notes and labels short. They do not have to be perfectly accurate, just somewhere in the ballpark. p.169 Use one-word or two-word statements that encapsulate what is going on at the moment. Don’t worry too much about the exact words you use since it is the process of observing that counts. p.168

Here are some good questions to ask yourself when making notes: What am I doing and why? Where did this come from and where is it leading? p.177

Step 2 – ReFrame (It’s Not Important)    top

Reframe false brain messages (e.g., thoughts, urges, impulses) to emphasize these messages are not important simply due to the fact they are false. If you dismiss them and stop feeding them attention they will eventually go away.

Here are some examples of reframing statements:
* “It’s not me, it’s just my brain!” p.89
* Attribute deceptive brain messages to bad brain wiring or biology with a phrase like “These feelings are not really me, they’re from some sort of old brain wiring problem and are not worth my attention.”
* If anxious for no reason you might say something like “Hey, the brain is causing this anxiety which is making my throat tighten … it’s just a brain thing that is causing the tension … it’s not me.”
* Start seeing deceptive brain messages as false foreign invaders rather than true warnings.
* Sometimes false messages are thinking errors that need reframing. Examples of what to say: “Don’t take it personal (personalization error).” Or, “Why should (should thinking error) I always (black & white thinking error) get everything (all-or-none thinking error) I want?”
* Here’s a list of some common thinking errors that filter out helpful information: should-ought-must thinking, false expectations, faulty comparisons, all-or-none thinking, black and white thinking, worst case thinking, discounting the positive, believing everything you think or feel, mind reading, prejudice, minimizing, and personalizing.

Step 3 – ReFocus (Do Something Productive)   top

Use your mind to refocus attention on something productive — even while the false urges, impulses, and sensations are still bothering you. p.90, p.230

It’s not what you think or feel that matters. It’s what you do that counts. You are not trying to make the feelings go away. Focusing on bad feelings just further entrenches them. Deprive the bad brain circuits of their essential fuel–your attention. p.240

Focus on something interesting and useful to you. Here are some ideas of what to focus on:
* Exercise.  Especially sports you like is a good focus for most people.
* Gratitude Lists. Quickly mentally list 3 things you are grateful for. p.272. This is also a good thing to do when you go to sleep and wake up just to improve your attitude.
* Your Work. This is a productive focal point, particularly when you are at work. 🙂
* Breathing. Do breathing exercises to calm yourself before refocusing.
* Meditation. Every time you make a mental note (relabel) of when your attention wanders and then bring your focus back (refocus) you are practicing refocusing. p.242 Even just 5 minutes of meditation makes a difference for me.

15 minute Rule
If you can’t resist your craving or obsession, try to wait fifteen minutes between when a deceptive brain message or uncomfortable sensation strikes and when you act.  Then try another 15 minutes if possible. Then mindfully engage in whatever activity your deceptive brain message is demanding. p.247

An option to the 15 minute rule is to gradually cut back on the activity.  Learn to temporarily live with the discomfort that arises without over-identifying with or excessively focusing your attention on it. p.321

Don’t beat yourself up should your obsession wins the early battles. That only gives it the attention which makes it stronger.   Just step back, know you can eventually beat it, and make specific plans detailing how you will come back stronger the next time.  Mental preparation, to help you better know what to expect and exactly what to do next time, will help you improve.

Step 4 – ReValue (Keep Practicing)    top

Clearly see the thoughts, feelings, urges, and impulses for what they are … sensations caused by deceptive brain messages that are not true and that have little to no value.  They are something to dismiss, not to focus on.

Revalue from the perspective of your Wise Advocate. p.276.  The more you practice using the 4-Steps the easier they become.

After you make significant practice & progress on the first three steps (ReLabel, ReFrame, ReFocus) shift to emphasizing Step 4: Revalue. You want to move beyond a mere cognitive understanding of your deceptive brain messages and get to the point of directly experiencing the bothersome sensations as nothing but a deceptive brain messages. When you are able to do this, you no longer will need to go slowly through Steps 1 & 2; rather, you will directly feel the deceptive brain message as nothing more than a deceptive brain message and immediately refocus your attention in a healthy way.  This is Step 4.  p.278

More Concepts to Consider

True or False Brain Messages
False messages happen because your brain is a short-term survival mechanism. True messages come from your true self. For example, if you lost a parent then “true” feelings of sorrow are natural and to be expected and worked through. Your Wise Advocate understands and supports true messages

Wise Advocate
The Wise Advocate is that aspect of your attentive mind which can see the bigger picture, i.e., what it would look to a wise outsider.

Your Wise Advocate is a good counselor and a friend within yourself. It knows what you are thinking and can tell you when brain messages are not true and where they came from. p.6, p.222.  The more you use it, the stronger your Wise Advocate becomes. p.225.

Refocus with Progressive Mindfulness
In the Progressive Mindfulness exercise you build your abilities by:
(a) purposefully facing situations that cause deceptive brain messages such as urges, thoughts, or uncomfortable sensations to arise,
(b) then refocusing your attention on constructive healthy activities.

This exercise is done progressively, purposefully adding more and more stress as your skill to dissipate such mental stress increases.  It results in your brain actually rewiring itself in beneficial ways while strengthening your Wise Advocate within.  The concept is not unlike systematically exercising physical muscles to develop their ability to handle future physical stress.

Refocus with Progressive Mindfulness is a way to systematically learn how to withstand false brain messages and to resist acting on unhelpful impulses when they arise. By practicing Relabeling you can learn to quickly, easily identify cravings for what they are–a desire to feel better right now.  Reframing helps you understand that strong impulses coming from your brain do not have to be acted upon if they are actually false messages.  Finally, you practice Refocusing your attention on constructive healthy activities even while still feeling uncomfortable sensations.  p.256, 277, 313.

Conclusion

You Are Not Your Brain is a good book to read, especially if you realize you are unconsciously doing things which are not to your long-term benefit. Don’t just drift or your brain will automatically take over. Become the boss of your brain … not its unhappy & unconscious servant.

---

Related Notes & Terms    top

• You Are Not Your Brain by Jeffrey Schwartz MD is the source of the quotes and page numbers in this article.  The emphasis is on conquering obsessions and compulsions.
• How to Conquer Cravings using the RAIN approach is discussed in The Craving Mind by Judson Brewer.  This is a similar but slightly different approach than than in You Are Not Your Brain.  The emphasis is on conquering cravings.
• Albert Ellis, the inventor of cognitive behavior therapy, wrote an entertaining book about classical thinking errors called How to Stubbornly Refuse To Make Yourself Miserable About Anything–yes, Anything.
• Deceptive Brain Message Definition: Any false or inaccurate thought or any unhelpful or distracting impulse, urge, or desire that takes you away from you true goals and intentions in life (i.e., your true self). p.3
• Top of Page, Categories, Index and Home Page

How to Conquer Unhealthy Cravings
From The Craving Mind by Judson Brewer, MD PhD

The Craving Mind recommends a scientifically proven technique for breaking tenacious addictions such as smoking or overeating (also lesser ones such as too much TV or staying up too late).

This technique goes by the acronym RAIN whose letters refer to a sequence of steps to take when you notice yourself getting tempted by a wave of wanting.  It’s closely related to the 4-Step method for mastering obsessions.

R – Recognize. Spot your cravings by carefully watching for them and becoming more mindful (via meditation). When you see one coming just relax into it but with eyes wide open.

A – Accept. Don’t try to make a craving quickly go away. Instead, get close & personal so that you can observe every aspect in its natural, uninhibited state.

I – Investigate.  Study everything about the craving. Get interested in the details of what’s happening.

N – Note. Be a scientist.  Take short notes describing what you observe.  This helps the details register so that you eventually start seeing patterns & truths which were previously invisible.

This process sounds like a strange way to treat bad habit loops (trigger-behavior-reward loops). But, by paying careful attention to the details many people start clearly seeing & feeling the (short-term & long-term) negatives for the first time.  Eventually they become disenchanted and just quit their habitual reaction.

The link between craving and doing gets broken, not by brute force but as an indirect result of more & more clearly seeing the balance of short-term vs long-term rewards received for acting on urges. Your inner self begins to viscerally recognize that “this addiction is not for me.”  This gut aversion comes about naturally on its own (don’t force it … this is an awareness experience not something you “will”) and sticks around for good once the details are really clear.

---

Here are more details using RAIN to help you ride the waves of wanting.

R – Recognize/Relax    top

If you can’t see something you can’t change it. Meditation & repeated practice of RAIN help you become more mindful. By the way, caring enough to seriously watch for your cravings is important so don’t bother if are not serious.

Typically people wander around in a more or less unconscious state. When confronted by a trigger they have feelings which lead to an urge or craving which leads to reactive behavior. They do everything possible to make their craving quickly go away to get perceived relief (irregardless of long term consequences).  The more they do it the stronger the habit.

The result: Quick, mindless relief.  An endless habit loop (trigger, behavior, reward) which gets deeper and more automatic every round.
The problem: Negative long-term impacts.  Grabbing quick relief becomes a habit whose unconscious repetition leads to long-term damage.

A – Accept/Allow/Acknowledge    top

The truth is you don’t have control over getting an urge. However you can look for it, accept it and relax with eyes wide open into it.  This is better than trying to ignore, avoid or distract yourself because now you have a chance to see what is actually happening and the details of how it sneaks up on you.

I – Investigate    top

Carefully study each wave of wanting as it builds. Don’t struggle to figure things out but simply observe what arises most prominently. Let your inner self see the details of the wave from when it starts to build up through when it completely subsides.

Become a detective and get interested, get fascinated. Some good questions to ask are “What does my body feel like right now?” and “What led to this and where does it lead to?”

If you become distracted return to the investigation by repeating the question “What does my body feel like right now?” See if you can ride the wave of wanting until it is completely gone.

N- Note/Nonidentification    top

As you investigate, simply note (mentally or on paper) what is most predominant in your experience.  Perfect precise descriptions are not needed; just start noting as best you can.  Use short simple phrases to describe the sensations experienced.  For example: sad, thinking, tight neck, lump in throat, ache in forehead, anxious, down at the mouth.   Noting the triggers-feelings-behaviors-actions helps you remember them so that eventually you can start seeing patterns and truths which were previously invisible.

Also, when we make notes about something we start perceiving it as something outside of ourselves and stop taking it so personally.  Not “taking it personal” actually shifts which parts of the brain are active making it easier and easier to see the real truths.

---

This RAIN process helps people pay attention to their habit loops (trigger-feelings-behavior-reward) so that they eventually become disenchanted with previous behaviors (e.g., smoking).  This is because the negatives (e.g., the taste of chemicals, later reactions) start becoming more visible and begin to outweigh the short-term relief reward. While the craving may continue to persist for a while the link between craving and action eventually weakens until the loop can be completely broken.  This is the goal:  to break the link between craving and action.

Related Notes & Terms    top

• The Craving Mind by Judson Brewer, M.D., Ph.D. & Director of Research at the Center for Mindfulness – Discusses RAIN and other modern research about breaking bad habits. Chapter 1 is the source of most of the material in this article and the page numbers shown are from this book.
• How To Stop Watching TV – An example of using RAIN.
• You Are Not Your Mind by brain scientist Jeffrey Schwartz suggests 4-steps for breaking obsessions & compulsions, which are slightly different than cravings.
• Ted Talk – Can we break bad habits by being more curious about them? Notice the urge, get curious, feel the joy of satisfying your curiosity, repeat. I.e., Become a detective.
• A general process to follow with confronted by an overwhelming challenge – Stop, step back, know there is a way (faith), observe (watch & learn, recon) in a relaxed open way.

• Addiction Definition: Continued use despite adverse consequences. p.18.
• Mindfulness Definition: The awareness that arises from paying attention, on purpose, to your present moment-to-moment experience. p.12-13.
• Cognitive Definition: Related to conscious intellectual activity (such as thinking, reasoning, remembering). Cognitive activity is the first to be lost when stressed.
• Top of Page and Home Page

Mini Habits can Change Your Life
They really can!

We all know how difficult it is to create a good new habit that actually sticks. Self motivation (it varies wildly) and will power (it quickly evaporates) just don’t seem to work. The sneaky inner self seems to resist.

This book Mini Habits by Stephen Guise provides a surprisingly practical approach. It can work even if you are part of the vast majority who cannot keep New Year’s resolutions. And that includes about 99.9% of us.

A mini habit is a stupidly small habit which you “decide” to practice every day. It is so small that miniscule willpower is required to make it happen. So little willpower and time are needed that the lazy, frightened subconscious part of your brain has no reason to bother resisting.

The result is that a mini habit can sneak in under the subconscious resistance that has been holding you back all your life. Eventually you will start developing the perseverance, momentum and enthusiasm which it takes for big permanent changes. Stop attempting to push your unconscious mind. Let mini habits work their repetitive magic on their own.

Also don’t bother making a mini habit bigger. Instead use your new-found emotional energy as a bonus to do more on those days, and only those days, “when you feel like it.” After a while your mini habit will automatically lead you to bigger habits so strong that will power and motivation are no longer even necessary. You’ll just do your new habit without emotion like you do other habits good or bad. And, if something goes wrong, you always have your mini habit to fall back on.

For much more information read Mini Habits. It’s short (126 pages) easy read with good explanations and research on the subject.

MORE NOTES FROM MINI HABITS    top

examples    top

Here are examples of small mini habits and the good habit where they might lead
* 1 pushup/day – leads to a bigger more healthy exercise program
* Walk treadmill 60 sec/day – leads to more healthy exercise
* Read 2 pages/day – improve the contents of your mind
* Write 50 words/day – get that writing project moving
* More ideas for mini habits

willpower    top

Will power is very limited as most of us have noticed a few days after our annual New Years resolutions. Mini habits solve this problem by requiring so little will power and so little time that it becomes laughable to avoid doing them.

motivation    top

The problem with motivation is that it is undependable. That is why you use will power (a very small amount) instead to guarantee your mini habits are accomplished.

On those lucky days when you do feel motivated, and that will most likely happen soon after starting mini habits, use this motivation as bonus energy. For example, if your mini habit is to do 1 push up then use your motivation to do more.

positive habits    top

Mini habits are designed to help you create good habits rather than to get rid of bad habits. See our post on the book Change Anything for information on getting rid of bad habits.

conclusion    top

Mini habits is an idea well worth testing for yourself. Pick some good habit that would make a big positive difference and reduce it down to a stupidly small but specific mini habit. Then religiously follow that mini habit every day for the rest of your life (or until it becomes clear that you can improve upon it).

When your motivation kicks in and you “feel” like doing more, then definitely do more. That’s what leads to bigger habits. And the improved motivation is a bonus you can eventually expect from mini habits along with better will power, momentum and results.

Related Links:    top

• • Return to Habits Links
  • The book Mini Habits by Stephen Guise which gives detailed explanations and research on the subject.
  • The Mini Habits concept is a useful variation on The Slight Edge concept and I think both authors would heartily endorse each other. Mini Habits is more specific and less far ranging. Being easier to digest and specifically implement I think it is good way to get started.
  • Change Anything is a book focused on getting rid of bad habits (vs making good habits)
  • Blog by Mini Habits author
  • Tiny Habits – free and easy 5-day internet course on tiny habits.
  • Top of Page, Categories, Index and Home Page