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Calming & Meditation Breathing Exercises

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Calming Breathing Exercises
& Meditation Breathing Exercises

Pay full attention to your breath .... in and out.
Concentrate on the natural flow of your breath, in and out, without controlling it.  When your mind wanders bring it back to your breath.

Breathing exercises are a great way to calm the body and mind.  Below are some different breathing exercises which I’ve tried.  You can do these for just a few breaths or a 20-30 minute meditation.  Every round helps you learn to calm yourself and to concentrate.  Pick a few exercises you like and practice regularly to to build your skills.

“4 For Calm” Breathing    top

Take 4 long slow breaths during which you
– Count silently from 1 to 4 with each breath in.
– Count from 1 to 4 with each breath out.
– Breath from the belly. Use the diaphragm (not the upper chest). The belly pushes out as you breath in. The belly pulls in as you push the air out.

This is a stress management technique recommended to community emergency response teams.

Another variation for handling stress is deep breathing with longer exhalation than inhalation.  Relax as much as possible and start to listen to your breath.  Then inhale to the count of five and exhale to the count of ten.  Don’t worry if your exhalation seems too short and you cannot last until the full count of ten.  Even if you only reach seven or eight counts that is fine.   This will improve with practice and the main objective is to exhale for longer than you inhale.

Simple Breathing Meditation    top

One of the simplest ways to meditate is to assume the calm attitude of a silent observer, watching the breath’s natural flow without controlling it as it enters and exits the body.  When your mind wanders gently bring it back to the breath.   Though very simple  and easy to do even for beginners this meditation technique is highly regarded by gurus.

Reference – How to Awaken Your True Potential by Yogananda, p.121.

“Find a quiet, peaceful place.  Sit comfortably erect.  Relax your body from head to toe, focusing on relaxing each body part.  Then take a few deep breaths.  Inhale deeply and exhale deeply, being conscious that you are breathing in and out.  This is the first step of withdrawal from external perceptions.  Now bring your mind to your nostrils and watch the flow of universal energy, prana, moving in and out.”

“Thoughts will come and go to take you away from your concentration.  Don’t worry.  Don’t condemn your thoughts.  Don’t condemn yourself.  Just relax.  Bring your focus back to your breath and keep breathing.  Keep watching your breath mindfully.  Let your thoughts go into the rising and falling of the breath.”

Reference – Your Mind Your Best Friend by Shuddhaanandaa Brahmachari, day 24.

This simple form of meditation “involves relaxing and focusing on your breathing.  Set a timer for three minutes and close your eyes.  Then, take slow, deep breaths.  Concentrate on each inhalation and exhalation, and ignore all other thoughts.”   You only need to do this for a few minutes to feel relaxed, refreshed and refocused.

Reference –  Fast Focus by Damon Zahariades,  p.108.

For a very simple Western method of spiritual contemplation see Friar Thomas Keating’s video on The Method of Centering Prayer.

Combat Tactical Breathing    top

Combat breathing is used by combat personnel and first responders (like policement & firemen) to reduce the shakes & stress experienced during high-risk situations.
– Breathe in through your nose as you count up to 4.
– Hold your breath to the count of 4.
– Breathe out through your lips to the count of 4.
– Hold your breath to the count of 4.
– Repeat until you feel your body and mind relax.

Another variation is not to hold your breath.  You can also change the count, like breathing in as you count to four (e.g., in 2 3 4) then breathing out as you count to seven (out 2 3 4 5 6 7) then repeat as needed until you calm down.

Another variation is to mentally say “reeeelaaaax” instead of counting as you breath out.  I.e., breath in 2 3 4 then breathe out as you say “reeeelaaaax.”

Reference 1 – Stop Stress on the Spot
Reference 2 – Flight Surgeon on Combat Breathing

Breath Counting Meditations    top

Counting silently to 4 with each breath in and counting to 4 with each breath out can help keep you focused. Sometimes this counting makes it easier to not lose concentration, especially when you are feeling scatterbrained. This is basically the same as combat breathing described above.

See how high you can mentally count your breaths without losing track of them during the following exercises. These exercises may show you how poor you really are at holding your attention on your breath.  When your mind wanders simply bring it back to your breath and start again at 1 if you can’t remember where you are.

  • Exercise 1 – Count on each inhale and each exhale. Inhale counting 1 then exhale as you count 2. Then inhale on 3, exhale on 4, and so on. It can be challenging to reach the count of 10 without losing track for some novices.
  • Exercise 2 – Count on each exhale. Inhale without counting then count 1 as you exhale. Count 2 on the second exhale and so on.  Count as high as you can easily go or just count to 10 and start over.
  • Exercise 3 – On the in-breath, count “one,” and on the out-breath, count “two.”
    Continue up to “ten.” Then begin again. If you lose count at any point, return to an inbreath,
    and start over at “one.” As thoughts and feelings, pain and discomfort, restlessness and sleepiness arise, allow your counting to gently override their distracting chatter

Step Counting Meditation    top

As you walk focus on your breath and count your steps as you go: 1, 2, 3, and so on. When you reach the 10th step, start again at 1.

Hong-Sau Meditation    top

Using the highly regarded Hong-Sau concentration technique you mentally chant “Hong” (rhymes with song) as the breath enters and “Sau” (sounds like saw) as it exits. Focus on your breath, watching it go in and out, but do not try to control it.

This breathing technique can give you a deep sense of inner calm and bring you to the realization that you are not your body but a soul, a silent conscious witness.

Hong-Sau means “I am spirit,” “I am he,”  or “I am he who watches.”  In his Autobiography Yogananda states: “Ham-sa (pronounced hong-sau) are two sacred Sanskrit chant words possessing a vibratory connection with the incoming and outgoing breath. Aham-Sa is literally ‘I am He.’”

A more expanded version of the mantra is: “I offer my little egoic self into my higher Divine Self.”  Note:  egoic self is the individual that the mind considers itself to be.  It is the voice of survival.

Reference 1 – Hong Sau technique
Reference 2 – 11 Reasons To Practice Hong Sau
Reference 3 – Yogananda on Hong Sau
Reference 4 – How To Awaken Your True Potential by Yogananda, Chapter 6, p. 120.

OM Breathing Chant    top

The sound OM or AUM has been chanted by Yogis for thousands of years tp bring them closer to “God.”   It is a sacred sound which stands for “who and what God is,” a concept which cannot be captured by a word or fully comprehended by the human mind.

  1. Take a deep breath in.
  2. As you exhale, chant the sound OM.
  3. When you run out of breath, breathe in and repeat the chant.
  4. Continue at your own pace for 2 to 3 minutes.

This can also be done silently.  Another variation preferred by Yogis is to use the sound Aaa-Uuu-Mmm where you feel the “Aaa” sound in your belly, “Uuu” in your chest area, and “Mmm” in your head.

A more Western variation I often use during Centering Prayer meditation is to silently say either “joy” or “peace” (rather than OM) on the breath out.

Reference – How to Use Sound to Heal Yourself

Related Links    top

To Be Happy – Fill Your Head with Good Stuff

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To Be Happy
Fill Your Head with Good Stuff

phillipines4-8-400
Thoughts which the Bible says should fill your head (from Philippians 4:8)

If you want to be happy then steadily, continuously keep filling your head with what’s good in your life. Fill it to overflowing.

index:  gigo | aim | smile | be here | gratitude | other | links

This steady effort is needed because our minds evolved to promote survival, not happiness.  It saves the happy chemicals for brief spurts which are quickly metabolized.  Therefore we need to keep taking steps that stimulate our happy chemicals.

So, be aware, be real but don’t dwell on negatives. This skill is something you can work on any time any place even when feeling poorly. Just do the best you can, no matter how small the improvement, and this purposeful mind control practice will eventually wash away the mental poisons that make you unhappy. It’s a bit like taking care of yourself when you are really sick.

Below are some of the best ideas we’ve found for filling your head with good stuff. Every person is different, so pick & choose test & modify these ideas to find which particular ones work best for you.

GIGO (Good In, Good Out)    top

“Good In, Good Out” is a nice twist on “Garbage In, Garbage Out.”  Science has shown in many, many studies that we are dramatically affected by our environment, far more than we believe.

Fill your mind with good thoughts if you want a good happy life.  Fill your environment with people and things that will uplift you.  Especially note  I Corinthians 15:31:  “Don’t let anyone deceive you.  Associating with bad people will ruin decent people.”

AIM (Attention, Interpretation, Memory)    top

In their book Happiness: Unlocking the Mysteries of Psychological Wealth top scientists in the field Ed Diener & Robert Biswas-Diener describe how to AIM for happiness. Here’s what they say.

Attention. “Stuff will never get into your head if you don’t look at it.” For example, don’t fill your head with bad news which has been spun to attract you for the ultimate purpose of making the media money. Negative people are another source of bad vibes. Instead keep your mind open to the good things you can be looking at instead which can make you happy.  Remember, GIGO … garbage in garbage out.

Personally, I actively avoid reading the deluge of negative news which tends to overwhelm the mind by its very volume. Science has shown we are all affected by our environment more than we assume. With a little thinking about the news, medicine commercials and other such junk it is not that hard to recognize its poisonous nature. Once that’s realized then completely avoiding such inputs is not that difficult to do.

Interpretation. The way we interpret facts determines whether we feel happy or not. Looking at a glass as half full rather than half empty is the classic example. Another one is realizing that losing a lousy job or relationship can sometimes be the best thing that ever happened.

Controlling interpretations is often just a matter of trying to find a good interpretation rather than allowing one’s self to blindly getting stuck with an initial reaction. If I just stop and try to come up with another interpretation it is often much easier than expected. Try it.

Memory. Relive and savor the positive moments. This is something you can control much more easily than controlling the future. Stop and mentally smell the roses in life, past as well as present. This is another good way to fill your head.

Stop Smile Be … Look Listen Like    top

This is an excellent, very practical exercise for immediately improving your immediate attitude. It’s an “upper” that often works for me.

Basically you Stop what you are doing, break into a big Smile (see Just Smile – the #1 Tip to Feel Better), then look around and start mentally noting what you like in your immediate present. See more details here. It’s a refreshing break, a bit similar to stopping and smelling the roses, which you can take any time.

Be Here Now    top

This particular moment is the only one that truly exists. “Yesterday is but a memory and tomorrow is only a vision” as my favorite poem says.

Learning how to be here now is a highly valuable skill to help you let go of sad memories or future fears. Meditation is one of the best ways to learn how concentrate mindfully on a desireable subject.

Joyful Gratitude    top

Another highly recommended practice is joyful gratitude. By learning how to first see and then focus on what is good about life you learn to fill your mind with gratitude rather than bitterness.

In my experience the best way feel joyful gratitude is to just keep trying until it starts happening. The Stop Smile Be Look Like exercise mentioned above is one that helps me; it’s fairly easy to spot something I “like.”  Another exercise is to think of three things you are grateful for right before going asleep. The idea is to make feeling joyful gratitude a habit that will eventually start coming naturally.

Other Related Thoughts    top

  • “What You Think About Comes About” – The overall subject of this website which you are now reading!
  • “First Within Then Without” – A classic mantra implying that what you think, feel and create within eventually appears without.
  • The Slight Edge principle of making the slightest move towards one’s goal is very useful for filling your mind with good stuff when you are down. I.e., keep working on making even the slightest progress … it eventually accumulates.
  • “Act enthusiastic to be enthusiastic.” Science has proven that physical actions cause feelings as well as the reverse.  It’s a feedback loop.
  • Get a happy pet. Many studies have shown that pets can help people live longer and become happier. We agree; the companionship and joie de vivre of happy pets adds much to our happiness. Our two dogs know how to enjoy the good life. Just watching them can teach a lot about being here now and about joyful gratitude.

Hopefully some of the ideas discussed above give you a start at filling your head with good stuff … and, at making you happier.

Related Links:    top

  • The book The Astonishing Power of Emotions: Let Your Feelings Be Your Guide by Esther & Jerry Hicks recommends that one of the best things to do to improve your life is to closely watch your feelings and then to do whatever it takes that very moment to make yourself feel a little bit better than you would have otherwise. We agree.
  • How To Find Happiness: 6 Proven Secrets From Research – Good article on how to use AIM (acronym for Attention, Interpretation & Memory) to increase happiness.
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STOP-SMILE-BE-LIKE exercise

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This is a good practical exercise for quickly improving your immediate attitude. It’s an “upper” that often works for me.

The exercise can involve several additional steps as described below but I think the basic “stop-smile-be” steps are the most important; you can delete or add the other steps based on what works for you personally.

Stop  Smile  Look  Listen  Feel Be Like Love Thank Reboot

Stop    top

Stop. Give your mind a quick break. Stop thinking about everything that is racing through your mind for a minute, particularly if feeling stressed or confused.

This is easy to do while walking down the street, driving your car or during mundane activities. Even during complex work you can look out the window for a minute, or just close your eyes, and take a mental break.

By the way, taking regular breaks to look out in the distance is also good for your eyes. Stretch breaks are good for your body as well.  And breaking your train of thought is good for your mind.

Smile    top

Big “true” smiling is a critical step in this exercise.  The physical act of making a big Duchenne smile will definitely make a positive difference in your attitude.  Just try it … scientific tests show that it works but much more important is your personal experience.

The more things you find to smile about during a day the better you will feel. Develop the habit of easily breaking into a big smile, and feeling it, at the slightest excuse.  It’s said that as people get older their happy or grumpy look develops into a permanent expression.  Strive  to become one of the happy ones.

Look-Listen-Feel    top

I find that the process of doing a careful, sequential look-listen-feel tends to get me out of my head and back into physical reality.  What I do is first carefully look around me, especially for things I like.  Then I listen.  Then I try to sense my feelings both about my surroundings and within my body.  It’s an excellent step towards being here now.

Really sinking into and recognizing your feelings of the moment helps the bad ones pass on naturally and helps the good ones grow. A big true smile will have started this process anyway.

If you are having problems with bad feelings and are religious the welcoming prayer exercise for some ideas on how to help them dissipate naturally.

Be Here Now   top

Be Here Now! Let the past and future disappear, they are just mental constructs, and get into the present. Stop, see and smell the many roses (i.e., the good things) around you. For at least a moment just do your best to “be here now” fully enjoying where you are at the moment.

Like   top

I find it is fairly easy to come up with 2-3 things just observed that I “like” since that just implies that I prefer having something to not having it.  I.e.,  I have a natural desire to move towards it (tropism).

Love, in this context, means caring strongly about something.  It is a much stronger word than like.

Thank    top

Exercise your gratitude muscle.  Mentally note (or better yet verbally speak out to yourself) the many things in the immediate present you have for which to be thankful.  Listing three things I’m grateful for is a good number for me; one thing doesn’t push me and four is too much.  Make sure you actually “feel” grateful for them.

In my case I often notice the great weather, the way I’m physically feeling, my dogs, or beautiful scenery. Recognizing the many great things that do exist about your immediate situation is an upper. Regardless of how bad the “past” or the “future” feels or how much better someone else may seem to have it in a particular situation, I find that the immediate present is often excellent!

As an obvious but often overlooked aside, those of us with the education and resources to read this Internet page were born far luckier than much of the World’s population. Notice how good you’ve really got it in general and in particular within this moment!  Building your gratitude muscle will definitely help improve your morale.

Reboot    top

This involves starting from scratch, clean and fresh from where you are at, as if the past had never happened. Rebooting often works well for fixing your computer and the Stop-Smile-Be exercise similarly often work wells for attitude problems.

A rebooting trick I find productive is to mentally look at the situation as if it were a completely new challenge and the next job is to make the most of it. The past is dead and buried, forgiven and gone. The challenge of the now situation is all that exists.  Very top athletes are able to handle game situations this way.

In a very real sense all that truly exists is this immediate moment in this day. As my favorite ancient Sanskrit poem states: “The past is but a memory and the future is only a hope.” The most you can really do is your best with what you are given right now.

Notes    top

  • I notice that actually stopping and verbally saying each step makes a difference.  Each step tends to register better on my mind when it is verbalized.  The steps I actually say are  “Stop Smile BeHereNow … Look Listen Feel … Like3Things” which reminds me to say three things I like about what I am experiencing right now.

Related Links    top

30 Day Challenges

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A 30 day challe30-day-challengenge is an activity goal which you set for yourself to do each and every day for the next 30 days.

This is a short enough period that you can & will actually do it; after all, you can do almost anything for 30 days. It is long enough that you should be able to get an idea of the benefits and a great start towards establishing a long-term habit if so desired.

Here are some examples of simple, practical, useful 30 day goals:

  • Meditate for 20 minutes twice/day.
  • No snacks between meals.
  • Exercise 15 minutes/day.
  • No TV. Or, limit yourself to a max of 1 hr/day.
  • Avoid reading news. This should help make you more positive. 🙂
  • No sodas.

Tips & Thoughts

  • Don’t start with too big a challenge.  I.e., do not begin anything you won’t  finish.  Later, after you have more experience, you may want to increase the  difficulty.
  • Accomplishing a 30 day challenge, no matter how easy, will help  increase your self-esteem and your will power. It will train you to keep your word to yourself.
  • Don’t do more than one or two challenges at a time. Overdoing is not a good approach with 30 day goals. It is far more important to persistently follow through and continue making new challenges as you finish old ones.
  • You can think ahead about possible next challenges while doing the current one. I like to think through variations and experiment for a few days with possible new challenges before committing to actually do anything.  It keeps me from feeling overloaded (after all, I’m not committed … just playing around) and helps me select better ones.
  • If you feel any embarrassment try a secret 30 day challenge. You are doing these challenges for yourself, not for others.  On the other hand, some people find that making a public committment is more motivating.
  • You can always modify or repeat a challenge if that is valuable.

Related Links    top

just SMILE — #1 tip to feel better

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just SMILE!
our #1 tip to feel better

smile-cat-1b240Just SMILE is truly a great tip. It’s easy, fast, free, and the results are immediate. Read on for how and why this tip works.  Then read our smile bonus tips further below.

It turns out that your body is so closely tied to your emotions that even if you fake a smile it will make you feel better. While scientists argue about the value of fake smiles most all agree that a genuine smile has real physiological and social benefits.

But what really matters is how smiling works for you! My personal experience is that repeatedly making big smiles to myself almost always helps improve my mood. This practice also makes it quicker and easier to smile at others which also affects your environment.

Here are some suggestions for practicing smiling at yourself:

  • Practice making what scientists call  a Duchenne smile, a genuine smile named for the researcher who first identified it. The muscles around the eyes are activated as indicated by raised cheeks, squinted eyes, and crows-feet wrinkles around the eyes.
  • When you feel good, give yourself a big enthusiastic Duchenne smile.
  • Every time you look into a mirror give yourself a giant smile. This is a good thing to do as you get ready in the morning.
  • Luckily you don’t need to worry about looking stupid when giving yourself giant smiles. So, practice them on yourself and also practice improving the smile you want others to see.  These two smiles may be closer than you think.
  • Practice your smile when you need a quick “pick me up.”
  • When you feel bad, practice making big genuine smiles to help turn your mood around. This often works for me.
  • When you happen to think about it practice smiling. It doesn’t take any effort and builds the habit.

Here are some suggestions for practicing smiling at others:

  • Make smiling a habit. For example, smile when greeting others, saying goodbye, saying thank you, when interacting with babies, and so on.
  • Always be ready to smile back in case someone smiles at you.
  • Observing the effects of your smiles on others makes for an interesting on-going experiment. One way to experiment is by smiling at safe strangers, such as a waiter or a friendly person on the street. Watch closely how others, especially friendly effective people, use smiles in their daily life.
  • Give extra smiles as a gift to anyone who might need one. If in doubt just go ahead and smile. My experience is that even if people don’t respond the first or second time (they are surprised) they often eventually turn from glum strangers into smiling friends.
  • Practice your smile in preparation for when you need to use it on someone important. Low-pressure practice makes high-pressure situations easier.

So, do yourself a big favor and give this smiling tip a serious test. Smile. 🙂

If this information works for you as well as it does for me then it could be one of the best tips you have ever received.

Bonus just Smile Tips

  • Make a habit of smiling to yourself every time you notice something you like and every time you notice yourself feeling good.   Start practicing a big easy smile, hopefully many times a day.  It will improve your base attitude and make other people like you more.
  • Make a big smile at yourself every time you see a reflection of yourself, e.g., in your bathroom mirror.  After all, you should be your own best friend and friends appreciate your smile.  You don’t have to be embarrassed to over do it since no one else will see … and it will eventually make it easier to make big easy smiles to others when appropriate.

Related Links    top

  • Tips Overview – More of our best tips
  • Science Fair Project about discerning fake versus genuine Duchenne smiles.
  • Stress Busting Smiles – Wall Street Journal Article
  • Michael Anthony Self Confidence Tapes – Anthony says you can’t experience a negative emotion when you smile, even if it is a fake smile, due to the body-mind feedback loop.
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